December 2009
103 posts
Mr Blue Sky
Just came on my Spotify playlist. Spotify knows how to put me in a great mood :D
Finishing work early is always a treat.
But this time it was a blessing, I don’t have to cram shower, hair, makeup, clothes and packing a bag into forty minutes :)
This lettuce tastes like tomato.
:(
“When you said you were falling apart I thought you meant that you were falling...”
– The Academy Is…
Noughties... a bad decade for popes.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DbQTIah7IrY
“She said there’s ants in the carpet, dirty little monsters. Eating all the...”
– Blur
A
;) I think you know what to do, Ms Meow.
“Did you know that for pretty much the entire history of the human species, the...”
– That essay can wait.
Tilly.
12. FUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
'Dear Ms Peters
Thankyou for joining the NHS Organ Donor Register and making the commitment to help others live after your death.’
AHEM. WHAT? WHEN THE HELL DID I DO THIS? Surely it’s a mistake, they must mean my mum… no. ‘Name: Charlotte Louise Peters. Date of birth: 12/12/1991’
Okay… so maybe it’s just a letter they send to everybody at this age. Oh wait...
Alan Partridge :)
Farmer: You fill a swan's stomach with burgers, it gets fat, floats better. That's why we do it.
Alan Partridge: Really?
Farmer: No, you ABSOLUTE CRETIN.
“I know, I’ve been in these situations before. I’m like Steve McQueen...”
– Bibby.
BOOYA
Another sick night AND I DIDN’T EVEN DRINK. Yeah bwoi. Karma was chilling round every corner, as proved by the beautiful body slam into a glass door by fat slag and generally appreciative friends doing me proud. Britt, Ben, Bibby, Lydia, Josh… heroes. Lynx, as per usual, failed in the taxi business but this was solved by me TERRORING them over the phone. Enjoying life currently, I am...
Had a horrendous nightmare last night.
One of the girls I used to hang around with quite a bit was a serial killer, except it kept switching between Emily O’Shea and Emma Smith which was odd. And she kept planning who to kill, telling Rachel who would tell me and then the people would die. Sooo I tried to use my Derren Brown type mind control to stop this from happening, but then the murderer (at this point it was Emma) followed...
For some reason my Dad's fiance decided to try and...
Dad replied with ‘are you joking? I own a pair of testes’ and Andrea (the fiance) backed away with a terrified look on her face.
What a confusing thing to witness.
“I think you should go fuck yourself. Or her. But definitely not me.”
– Bridget Jones.
One of the cleaners from work is stomping round...
Because she found a shitty nappy under one of the tables. Hazel Grove, you are pure class.
Also Ryan is doing magic tricks and I am truly astounded. Either I’m just really stupid and easy to fool he is truly a miracle worker.
Breathing is very difficult for me currently.
Me and Britt watched the actual worst film to ever be made today. Why the makers of St Trinians 2 thought Sarah Harding would pass for a highschool girl when she’s blatantly an old hag is beyond me. I do however have massive envy for Annabelle Fritton.
“The days are long but the nights are longer
And after midnight the drinks can...”
– The Bronx - Rape Zombie.
Anticipation has a habit to set you up for...
My first proper day off in about 2957294572 million years so the possibilities were endless. But buses are flaky as hell due to the ice and where even are you all? You’re all useless except Britt and I can’t even get to her due to the aforementioned buses and the fact that she’s in Macc. If tomorrow’s no better I’m going back to the seven days a week routine. Might...
My doctor will not stop trying to inject me.
Phonecall from the receptionist at the doctor’s reminding me of my HPV vaccine which I have twice told them I do not want.
P.S
Remember to log out of shit. Srs.
I'm Charly Peter's and my boyfriend's better than...
He loves me so much, he’ll go on my tumblr and make sure every one knows how gay I am. I’m really gay. Edit: REALLY GAY.
John Simpson, BBC News. Via Banksy. A bit of hope.
The corrupt and brutal regime of President Ceausescu of Romania was infamous across the world. His ferocious government had run the country emphatically for many years, crushing any signs of dissent ruthlessly. In November 1989 he was re-elected President for another five years as his supporters at Party Conference gave him forty standing ovations.
On December 21st the President, disturbed by a...
“A lot of people never use their initiative because no-one told them to.”
– Do not question authority. Continue doing as you’re told and everything will be okay.
I am now afraid of the following things:
-Being donkey punched; -Being stabbed but staying alive with the knife in me; -Subsequently being tortured by one of my best mates in exchange for a tape containing proof that he killed a girl by donkey punching her, and finally dying; -Being shot with a flare gun and setting on fire; -Being trapped on a boat with the person who murdered my best friend, his brother and his two best mates; -One day...
“Many people use the word ‘chocoholic’. I’m not so keen on that...”
– I love idiots.
John Snow, Channel 4 news.
No word of a lie, he just said that America was ‘quite clearly fingering China’.